Month: December 2007

“sign and drive”

Adverbs, Common English Blunders, Conjunctions, Devolution toward Simpler

This phrase is the starting point of a Volkswagen TV commercial.

Problem:
The conjunction “and” is used even though the adverb “then” is what is meant.

Explanation:
This humorous TV ad begins with a Volkswagen spokesman inviting viewers to attend VW’s “sign and drive” event. The ad then shows future VW customers signing documents on clipboards while they attempt to navigate an automotive obstacle course, presumably at a VW dealership. The drivers obviously are distracted by the task of signing documents; they drive over traffic cones and almost crash into one another. Upon seeing the driving problems, a man in a suit whispers into the VW spokesman’s ear, and the spokesman then announces an “even better” event called the Volkswagen “sign THEN drive” event.

The common English blunder here, which VW illustrated very well, is using the conjunction “and” when the adverb “then” is what is meant. The problem with “and” between two verbs is that it can be (and should be) interpreted as implying parallel, not sequential, actions. Replacing “and” with “then” ensures a sequential-actions meaning.

Unfortunately, many use “and” when they should use “then”. I believe that the use of “and” instead of “then” when the latter is appropriate represents a laziness that favors easier-to-pronounce words. The word “and” is easier than the word “then” to say.

Solution:
“sign THEN drive”

“which is very fun”

Adjectives, Adverbs, Common English Blunders, Nouns

I heard this last night in a television advertisement during which someone associated with the TV show “nip/tuck” was discussing the joy of the show satirizing itself.

Problem:
Although the American Herritage Dictionary says that “fun” is sometimes used informally as an attributive adjective, “fun” traditionally is a noun.

Explanation:
The speaker used the word “very” as an adverb to intensify an adjective, but the word “fun” traditionally is a noun. Use of “fun” as an adjective is still noted in dictionaries as an informal use. Although such expressions as “a fun time” [sic] started to appear in the 1950s and 1960s, this use of “fun” as an adjective should be avoided, especially in writing. If “fun” is properly used as a noun, then it requires an adjective, not an adverb, to modify it.

Solution:
“which is much fun”

“Can” vs. “May”

Common English Blunders, Devolution toward Simpler, Foreign Languages, Verbs, Versus

One word is often misused for the other.

Problem:
The auxiliary verbs “can” and “may” are not synonyms, at least not in their primary definitions.

Explanation:
The primary definition of the auxiliary verb “can” is to be able to. For example, He can dislocate his own shoulders. would be an appropriate use of this auxiliary verb. The primary definition of the auxiliary verb “may” is to be allowed or permitted to. For example, May I have another piece of cake? Yes, you may. would represent appropriate uses of this auxiliary verb.

Unfortunately, many use “can” when they should use “may”. I believe that the use of “can” instead of “may” when the latter is appropriate represents

  • a laziness that favors easier-to-pronounce words,
  • a foreign-language influence, and
  • an aversion by Americans to ask for permission.

The word “can” is easier than the word “may” to say. “Can” is spoken with an open mouth and comes out of the mouth quickly. It also begins with a hard consonant, which is easier than a soft consonant to vocalize. “May” requires the speaker to begin with a closed mouth and a soft biting of the lips, so it starts with a soft consonant and ends with a vowel sound. “May” must be vocalized longer than “can” to be understood. Try to say “may” quickly; it will confuse many listeners.

Also, consider the influence on American English today of a relatively large population of native-Spanish speakers. The Spanish auxiliary verb “poder” truly means both “can” and “may”; Puedo usar el baño. means both I can use the bathroom. and I may use the bathroom.

As more native-Spanish speakers in the U.S. learn English, they will tend to use “can” instead of “may” because “can” is more easily pronounced and because “can” and “may” are interchangeable in their native language.

Finally — here comes the psychological mumbo-jumbo part — I believe that Americans in general (including me) have an aversion to asking for permission.

So we prefer “Can I have another piece of candy?” to “May I have another piece of candy?” because semi-consciously or unconsciously we believe that we’re not asking for permission by using “can” instead of “may”.

Solution:
Use “can” when you want to refer to ability, not permission; use “may” when you want to refer to permission.