Huge numbers of people use “they” when they should use “he” or “she” instead.
Problem:
The pronoun “they” is not a synonym for the pronouns “he” or “she”.
Explanation:
The pronoun “they” is a plural, third-person pronoun. For example: When the customers called, they complained about having to press several buttons to speak to an agent.
The pronoun “he” is a singular, third-person, masculine pronoun. For example: When the customer called, he complained about having to press several buttons to speak to an agent.
The pronoun “she” is a singular, third-person, feminine pronoun. For example: When the customer called, she complained about having to press several buttons to speak to an agent.
Unfortunately, many people erroneously will use “they” as if it were a synonym for “he” or “she”: When the customer called, they complained about having to press several buttons to speak to an agent.
The problem with this approach is that “the customer” is singular whereas “they” — which refers to “the customer” — is plural.
There are four possible solutions to this problem, which arises when the speaker or writer does not know the sex of the subject:
- Use “he” instead of “they”.
- Use “she” instead of “they”.
- Use “he or she” instead of “they”.
- Reword the sentence to avoid having to use a pronoun.
Some feminists object to solution #1, even though the use of “he” as a neuter pronoun was the standard in English (American and otherwise) for decades, if not centuries.
Others object to solution #2, even though some feminists see this as getting even for the long history of solution #1.
Still others object to solution #3. They see it as stilted or awkward, especially when several such sentences exist in a paragraph or set of paragraphs.
Solution #4 suffers from none of these objections, so this is the one that I recommend. For example: The calling customer complained about having to press several buttons to speak to an agent.
Solution:
Use “he” when one knows that the subject is male. Use “she” when one knows that the subject is female. Reword the sentence to avoid having to use a pronoun, when one does not know the subject’s sex.