Common English Blunders

“2 Complete Pair for $99”

Common English Blunders, Devolution toward Simpler, Number

I saw this in a television advertisement two days ago.

Problem:
“Pair” is a singular noun being used incorrectly as a plural noun.

Explanation:
The TV ad was from EyeMasters, which was promoting the fact that a customer could buy two complete sets of eyeglasses for $99.

A set of eyeglasses — one for each eye — is called a pair of eyeglasses.

Multiple sets of glasses is the same as multiple pairs of eyeglasses.

I believe that the misuse of “pair” as a substitute for “pairs” is consistent with my “Devolution toward Simpler” linguistic hypothesis. It is simpler to say “pair” than to say “pairs”.

For fun, I searched Google for each of the following phrases (with the quotation marks) and got about the indicated numbers of matches:

  • “two pairs” — 3,230,000 matches
  • “two pair” — 1,080,000 matches

This tells me that Web authors favor “two pairs” over “two pair” by a pitiful ratio of 2.99:1.

Solution:
“2 Complete Pairs for $99”

“… its on sale …”

Apostrophes, Common English Blunders, Contractions, Possessives

I saw this today in an online news article about the recent launch of the Sprint XOHM service in Baltimore, Maryland.

Problem:
An apostrophe is missing.

Explanation:
The complete sentence was You can attach one of four service plans to your XOHM devices: The “home” plan works with the home modem, for 35 a month (its on sale through December 31st for25), the “On the go” plan is for the ExpressCard, at 45 a month (30 on sale.), and “Pick 2” lets you get two devices (a modem and a card, for instance) for 65 a month (50 on sale).

The word “its” — spelled I-T-S — is a possessive pronoun.

The article writer is trying to say that the home-plan service is on sale through December 31, 2008, with “it” substituting for the name of this service.

In other words, the expression should have been written with the contraction form of “it is” in “… it is on sale …”.

Solution:
“… it’s on sale …”

“Home Theater Install Unit”

Adjectives, Common English Blunders, Devolution toward Simpler, Nouns, Verbs

My wife saw this yesterday on the side of a delivery truck.

Problem:
The sign maker used a verb where an adjective was required.

Explanation:
The delivery truck belonged to a retailer that sells home-theater systems.

The retailer uses the truck to deliver new home-theater systems for installation.

This gives us the solution. The word “Install” is incorrect on the sign because it is a verb. The sign maker should have used the word “Installation”, which is a noun that can be used as an adjective.

Unfortunately, at least in American English, it has become a common English blunder to use the verb “install” as if it were a noun, which it is not.

I believe that the misuse of “install” as a substitute for “installation” is consistent with my “Devolution toward Simpler” linguistic hypothesis. It is simpler to write the seven-letter, two-syllable word than to write the twelve-letter, four-syllable word.

Solution:
“Home Theater Installation Unit”